Hey.

Haven’t been posting much these day. Maybe since the kids are grown men and I’ve said most of what I had to say on parenting I’ve tried to be more of a listener.

At dinner the other night a friend kind of let me (and her husband) have it about what men need to do to step up in this moment as women are being denied a fundamental human right thanks to the Supreme Court. I felt both taken aback by my friend’s vehement and passionate anger, and also knew she was right.

But what voice do I have, I asked myself? And so here I am on my dusty little forgotten blog.

Yet just as I was trying to form words on how we might counter this current attack on freedom for women, I learned that there was a shooting in Highland Park Illinois. I grew up in Chicago, called my brother who lives there, and found out that his close friend’s friend is in surgery, another friend’s aunt is dead, a doctor friend of theirs texted that he did CPR on a child and saw at least five dead bodies, two completely “eviscerated by bullets.”

Although I made many hours of calls to swing states to support Democrats in 2020, I tire of their failure to effectively stop this current slide into erosion of women’s rights, more guns, more dead children, more suicide, more depression, more addiction, more climate denial/or disinterest, more racism, more hate for LGBTQ+ people, more power in the hands of the few against the will of the majority… yet we know that more Republican senators and congressmen and congresswomen will not make things better.

I want to be an ally, and I will make more calls, give time and money, march, and while I do not have the vision to know how to contribute optimally and effectively, much less win, I suspect that our collective power is not yet harnessed for maximum impact.

If you are on the sidelines, please join in whatever way feels right for you. The first calls I made in 2019 had me sweating with anxiety, my stomach in knots, as I felt like I was intruding on people’s lives, but I remember speaking with a frightened woman in Michigan who felt certain Trump would win with all the intimidating shouting and banners around her; but she quietly voted and HE DID NOT WIN.

At the end of the Day, the end of so-called “Independence Day” there are enough of us who believe in equality and women’s fundamental human rights for us to win on this single and era-defining issue if we use our power, our voices, our strength in standing together as women who deserve empowerment, respect, and where needed, protection, and as men to use our power, privilege, passion, and whatever else we have to lend to the cause to stand with our mothers, sisters, daughters, nieces, friends, and fellow human beings.

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Joe Biden as a kid jpeg

 

If you haven’t voted in the 2020 US election and you are eligible to do so I am asking you to please vote, and to vote for the candidate who is not a bully.

I have worked in schools, and I have seen that bullying is a terrible problem.

Social scientists have studied the problem and the solution comes when a school supports kids to work out bullying problem amongst them selves—by creating a non-bullying environment.

It starts at the top, but the kids create the kinder environment by all agreeing that bullying is not cool and everyone has an obligation to call it out when we see it, even if we are not the target of the cruelty.

The plan is not to shame the bully, but to let them know that this is a school, or a country, where it’s cool to be nice, and that the bully can fit in if they act nicer.

That simple.

Humans do not want to be disliked. Bullies are not necessarily disliked or “unpopular.” The key is not changing the bully or the victim so much as the overall tone of the school, or the country.

We do not need to hurt others or exclude others in order to have good lives. The best society is one that supports excellence to lead—to understand that leading is serving the group, not dominating and definitely not exploiting or stealing from the group.

If you hate bullying behavior, you are not alone, and you have the power to assert that it’s cool to be kind.

So… if you are eligible to cast a vote on Tuesday, or see the County Clerk on Monday, please socially distance, wear a mask, bring a snack, and a lawn chair—and VOTE!

Maybe bring a friend.

It matters. We can have a better world.

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Mr Innocent

January 16, 2020

                                    Hi. Recent months have included procrastination, and so I’m just now posting a link to my latest comic, which itself is partly about procrastination. My younger son also said that it was “non-linear,” and I guess I […]

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Agnes Service Dog For Dogs

September 5, 2017

Our dog Agnes has been with us through thick and thin. In light of her service to us we decided to honor her by creating a set of stories featuring her as a service dog for other animals. Here is a sneak preview of the first installment of Agnes Service Dog For Dogs. For more […]

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Want Something or Go Home

January 5, 2017

I made a new comic book. Please check it out: http://awkwardtangent.com/want-something-or-go-home/    

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What Our Nightmares About Our Children Could Mean

September 23, 2016

Dear Dreamer, You are most likely reading these words because you had a nightmare, perhaps some weeks or even months ago now, perhaps last night. I’m going to try to keep this brief, but please understand that I am trying to write something that could be helpful to you, but also to your fellow parents […]

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Do What You Love

May 2, 2016

Hi all!  It’s been ages since I have posted anything, but I wanted to say hello to readers who still subscribe to Privilege of Parenting, and welcome to any new readers who may wander by. when I was blogging about parenting I realized that I ended up giving a fair amount of advice, when mostly […]

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Wake Up

January 19, 2015

I would say, “Happy Martin Luther King Day,” except we’re not there yet.  Instead let’s just acknowledge that it’s Martin Luther King Day and admit that we have not yet overcome and that today’s a day to keep on pushing forward on liberty and justice for ALL. When I left Selma the other night I […]

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A Review of “Little Elliot, Big City,” by Mike Curato

August 26, 2014

Of all the imaginary juice joints in the wide world of the child’s mind, it had to be Elliot, Little Elliot who walked into Bemelmans Bar at the Carlyle where I was sitting with my legs dangling from a booster seat, trading “what time is it?” jokes with Madeline.  Ferdinand was drowsing over a flower […]

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nothing to say but it’s okay

April 6, 2014
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