The weight of a heavy sigh

November 22, 2009

In yoga class we sometimes let it all out with a sighing sort of breath and it feels good, but this might not be something to necessarily do in front of the kids.  As we head into the holidays, a season heavy with family dynamics and ghosts of the past, beware the heavy sigh. As […]

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When daddy’s little girl just wants mommy

November 21, 2009

Amanda inquires about a discord between her husband and her nearly three-year-old daughter:  “I am writing to ask for your guidance on an issue that we have been experiencing in our family for the last year and a half: an extremely attached-to-Mama Sophie who is often so cold to her Papa that he feels very sad and rejected.  […]

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Logical consequences exercise

November 20, 2009

While there is room for myriad parenting philosophies from fairly authoritarian to laissez faire, an area I see parents struggle is in coming up with consequences for negative behaviors.   Research suggests that an engaged and loving relationship between parents and kids, backed up by firmly held limits, correlates with good self-esteem and positive social […]

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From letting her hair down to pulling it out—economic stress trickling down to kids

November 19, 2009

Yesterday was about Rapunzel which (as well as witch) turns on the letting down of hair, while today we turn to a recent New York Times article about the effects of economic and family stress on children, including the case of a nine-year-old girl who, in reaction to her father’s unemployment, was “pulling out strands […]

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Letting our hair down on salad days

November 18, 2009

The other day in the garden I noticed a field of weeds sprouting where there were supposed to be nothing but walking path.  Then I realized that they were volunteer arugula and I was pleased.  This got me thinking about the nature of nature and how the raised vegetable and herb bed was for plants […]

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Helping kids say farewell to pets

November 17, 2009

It’s been a sad week for pets in my circle—my neighbor’s dog ran into the road and was hit by a car and killed, while friends had to put their dog down after a long illness.  Besides being sad for us grown-ups when we lose a beloved pet, it also raises the issue of what […]

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Water on the moon

November 16, 2009

Scientists recently hurled an empty rocket stage into a crater on the moon where it’s about 365 degrees below zero, throwing up a cloud of dust so they could analyze it.  They found a number of gallons of water, by their calculations, suggesting that there could be raw material to make into drinking water, oxygen […]

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Men who stare at goats; parents who gaze at children

November 15, 2009

I recently saw the film Men Who Stare at Goats and although it was pleasant enough, it was ultimately disappointing.  One of the chief problems with the film, in my view, was its tone:  it strives for “whacky” but ends up forced.  I suspect that the reason for this discordant tone was the subject matter—army […]

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Always work with kids and animals

November 14, 2009

Back in my film days I would hear actors say, “Never work with kids or animals.”  Now this makes total sense if your livelihood depends on people paying attention to you, since kids and animals are naturally magnetic to the eyes, particularly when on screen alongside actors.  This offers potential insight into both the alienating […]

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Cultivating a work ethic

November 13, 2009

When it comes to academics, I’ve been thinking about where to set the bar for my kids, and about the topic in general. A reader commented:  “One thing that’s tough for me and my husband is that neither of our kids seems to have much of a work ethic.  We rarely see them study.  My […]

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